Hope & Quill Co.

From a very young age, we are taught to always be looking toward the future. In elementary school, we’re looking forward to middle school, and then high school. Then the question becomes college? No college? If college, which school? What career path should I seek?

We get through these questions and begin looking for a spouse, figuring out where we want to live, what job we want do, how many kids we want to have, the list goes on. Time passes, we wake up one morning, and it’s time to retire. My point is life is truly a vapor. Thus, we must find what gives this vapor meaning.

“Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away.”

James 4:14

Finding My Purpose

Growing up, I knew I wanted to attend university. I thought that’s “normal” people did. My mom homeschooled me and my siblings before homeschooling was cool, so feeling like an outsider (not being able to relate to what a first or second block was, etc.) was a common theme, as most of my friends and cousins attended public schools.

*BUT*

I am SO thankful my mom took the time and made the sacrifices to homeschool me. As an adult, I see so many benefits that I could not see as a kid who just wanted to fit in. But now homeschooling is the new cool, so yay!

All that to say, I went to college. I did not find it to be as wonderful as I had romanticized. But I got my piece of paper. Whoohoo!

After changing my major so many times and finally graduating, I was then thrust into this new chapter where I had to find a job. I found a couple, but never felt fulfilled in any of them. What difference was I truly making? What was the point of my space? My existence?

I struggled with depression for several years, feeling like I had no direction, no purpose. It wasn’t until a few months ago that it finally clicked for me: God did not create me to be in this rat race of climbing the corporate ladder. He did not create me, as a woman, to find fulfillment in this way.

So, do I have a job? Yes. Am I hating on women who do find fulfilment in their career? No. But my purpose does not come from my 9 to 5.

Okay, so where does it come from?

“She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.”

Proverbs 31:27

I have found purpose in being a wife and homemaker. Preparing healthy meals, trying to maintain a clean home, learning how to do wifey things, and serving others brings me great peace, knowing that I am fulfilling God’s design for my life.

For several years, I had been in the mindset of “I’ll do all these things when I have children, then my life will have meaning.” I was failing to live in the now, looking so far into the future that I was neglecting my current purpose. There’s nothing wrong with having hopes and dreams, but we can’t let them overshadow the present.

I heard one woman say, “as women, our home is our ministry.” God is no less pleased with us when we wake up and start our day by ministering to our husbands and children than if we were on the mission field. If our home is where He has placed us, then take joy in knowing that He is pleased when we are in our place.

What does this type of ministry look like?

I by no means have it all figured out. I’m very much figuring this out as I go, but one of the ways I minister to my husband daily is by making sure he has a solid, healthy breakfast before he goes to work. I benefit from this too, so don’t think I fancy myself as some kind of saint. I hate cereal and prefer a protein-based breakfast (if I’m going to eat breakfast). But I also know that my husband appreciates these morning meals to start his day.

Maybe cooking isn’t your thing or neither of you like breakfast. That’s fine! One of the best ways to start your day’s ministry is in prayer for your husband, your children, and your home.

I will speak on the husband side of this since I do not have children. Lifting your husband up to the Lord is a special thing. Now is this going to make him perfect? Well, no. But it helps me to have a better attitude towards him, so that when he does make a mistake (and he will, because he is human), I am able to find grace much quicker than if I haven’t prayed for him. Do I always do this? Unfortunately, no. There are days I fall short in this area. But is that an excuse? Absolutely not. I need to work on this area in my own life.

“That’s great, but how do I find MY purpose?”

Start with asking God to direct your paths. One of my life-long favorite Bible verses is Proverbs 3:5-6. “Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Here are 6 easy steps that I used to help find my purpose:

1. Ask God for direction.
2. Ask myself what drives me? What brings joy into my life?
3. Write down my top three goals in life.
4. Write down my top career paths.
5. Do a pros and cons sheet for each.
6. Ask myself which of my goals and career options most align with my driver.   

I won’t lie, I did not sit down one day, do this exercise, and then have it all figured out. I doubt I will ever have it all figured out. But it did help organize my thoughts and center my focus. Once I nailed down the one motivator that has been present in my life since I was a child, I gradually started to see a picture of how this could all play out. Until I did this, my vision of the future was a haze with bits and pieces floating everywhere.

I hope this helps you on your journey to find your purpose. If you know your purpose, then I hope this post has been an encouragement to you.

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